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}} Roy deals with the new High Priestess of Hel. Cast * Roy Greenhilt ◀ ▶ * Veldrina ◀ ▶ * High Priests of the Northern Pantheon: ** High Priestess of Odin ◀ ▶ ** High Priestess of Freya ◀ ▶ ** High Priestess of Sif ◀ ▶ ** High Priestess of Hoder ◀ ▶ ** High Priest of Balder ◀ ▶ ** High Priest of Freyr ◀ ▶ ** High Priestess of Hel ◀ ▶ ** High Priest of Vafthrudnir ◀ ▶ Transcript Veldrina: Roy! Are you OK? Do you need healing? Roy: I'm fine. They weren't even attacking, just trying to get past me. Veldrina: Are you going to fight the new High Priestess of Hel now? Roy: No. Roy: I'm not her bodyguard. When the guy pretending to be Durkon transferred his position, I lost my formal status. Roy: Right? High Priestess of Odin: ...Yes, I am afraid. Veldrina: Wow, how did you know that's how it works? Roy: I just guessed the single most frustrating way to rules-lawyer it. High Priestess of Freya: The covenant between the gods is explicit—an attack on any attendee by an outside force is an attack on all. High Priestess of Sif: We'd be bound to defend her, or at least not interfere while Hel's allies killed you. High Priest of Freyr: Maybe even in ways we couldn't fix! Roy: Honestly, I've got half a mind to take one for the team and try anyway. Being dead's not so bad. Roy: I've got a cool little nightlight with my name on it, and I could go with some home cooking. Roy: But even if I kill her before they toast me, that wouldn't tie this all up with a neat bow. Roy: If I die, my team falls apart and Big X moves into scoring position—and everyone is right back here voting in a week or two. Roy: Recent lesson, connected to that "dying" thing: Noble sacrifices only make sense when they solve the problem at hand. Roy: The only way the world stays saved is if this vote fails and we never have another one. Veldrina: But...now everyone knows about Hel's plan to suck up all the dwarf souls ant take over! There's no way they'll side with her again. Roy: Oh, right. Because no one's ever voted for oppressive safety over risky freedom before. High Priestess of Sif: I'm afraid he is right. Loki's words may have convinced some of our deities to give mortals one more chance, but is the situation worsens... who knows? High Priest of Balder: I still don't get why they were voting! And where did all those vampires come from?!? Roy: That, I can answer. Roy: That staff has a bunch of obscure necromancy spells in it. I'm guessing he burned a lot of charges getting them all up on their feet. High Priestess of Hel: That staff is the property of the Church of Hel, and the official regalia of the high priest. High Priestess of Hel: I hereby issue a formal request that it be turned over at once, in accordance with protocol. Roy: Oh, of course, gotta follow protocol. Roy breaks the staff in half with a loud "'SNAP!".'' Roy tosses the staff pieces to the High Priestess, smacking her in the face with them, "SMACK!" '''Roy: The Order of the Stick is not responsible for any damage that may occur during the delivery of unholy relics. D&D Context * A "rules laywer" is a player who attempts to use the letter of the rules without reference to the spirit in order to gain advantage in the game. * Magic items such as staffs and wands have "charges" which limit the number of times they can be used. Trivia * Roy's mom makes him some of her special jambalaya in #600. * Malack's staff, which first appeared alongside him and eventually ended up in the possession of "Durkon" is snapped in half by Roy. External Links * 1022}} View the comic * 477767}} View the discussion thread Category:Godsmoot